Aita for refusing to be my best friends maid of honor

Aita for refusing to be my best friends maid of honor. AITA for refusing to allow my BIL or his kids into my house? Not the A-hole. Her husband (35m) was a widower with kids (11m) and (10f). Ok, let me explain. I (25f) have a fraternal twin sister and am getting married next fall. She has never once come and visited me, I usually visit her once a year. Surround yourself with your closest and the people who makes you happy! Congratulations to you and your significant other! 2. It's a big commitment, and if you're not feeling comfortable or appreciated, it's totally valid to step back. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: 1- not making my sister maid of honor. AITA for not bringing a cake to a wedding I was uninvited from? Not the A-hole. I know the title might sound bad but just put yourself in my shoes. I put aside a good chunk of money so I was able to pay, about $3000 to be exact. You’d still be NTA as you have stated several times, very clearly, that you can’t do these things. He'll be your man of honor, which i'm sure makes him very proud. I won't do my hair in a way that makes it look We recently discussed who would be standing up for the bridal party on each side. 4. Egos can get in the way, and the focus on the end result can get lost. His family seemed to have pushed the issue and this contacting the mod team. tl;dr: my best friend is pregnant and marrying my ex boyfriend. The woman shared the crass joke to Reddit's Am I The A**hole forum, under I refused to be my ex bsf maid of honor due to past issues and also don’t want to be a last choice. This was sort of expected as Jane is essentially a sister to me. Hi! I might be the asshole because I am refusing to move my wedding date so my best friend can attend. While I do think you should tell her, I don’t think it’s completely unreasonable to not. His first wife died 5 years ago I believe. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: 1- telling my sister that I refuse to be her maid of honor due to the responsibility I don’t want. Round 3 - carry one very heavy box up and down the stairs 50 times. I’m supposed to go to the wedding of my ex best friend this weekend. She would get upset when people would say it wasn't as valid as being married. 5. Maybe have a heart-to-heart with her and explain how you're feeling. Up until this point Liz has been a very kind woman, so this was a total 180* from her typical behavior. No need to be rude, but it is time to move on, even though I'm sure it hurts. I hate doing this to my best friend. Amy dismissed how I feel about this. (She was jealous of all the attention he was giving the bride!) We’d never met her before, but that didn’t matter. I spent nearly $700 on her Bachelorette party, buying ADMIN MOD. She told me on Sunday, I had an AITA post that blew up on Tuesday and I travelled to see her yesterday to hash it out. There has been a pattern where there is always drama between our friend group each time one of our friends get married. The maid of honor and Bridesmaids are actually the ones who are supposed to plan the bridal shower. You aren’t an asshole for not sitting for her or wanting to feel valued as a friend. ” Especially over an abusive sister who's assaulted you in the past. We see them 4-5 times a year. We've been inseparable since kindergarten, and I was ready to make her big day unforgettable. Morgan and Jack are getting married in August of this year. And especially stop messaging me because AITA banned you. Recently, Jane got engaged to her long-term bf, and I was thrilled for her. Honestly, I was worried that I was the asshole. For background, Stella and I are identical twins, 29F and we will both be 30 when her wedding comes around this fall. Apr 26, 2024 · Being a part of your best friend’s wedding; it can be challenging, but it can also be one of the most memorable days ever. There can be a matron AND maid of honor as well. AITA for not wanting to be my best friends “secret maid of honor”? Not the A-hole. AITA for refusing to let my GF read my female best friend and I’s messages. The people in this story are my best friend “Jane”, her brother “Elliot”, and his girlfriend of two years, “Kathy”. So me (23F) and my friend Selena (23F) have been best friends since 1st grade in a small town. But, my MIL seems to think she knows better. We've been working hard on training and creating a loving home for our furry friend. s. She understands. Everyone important -friends and family- knows about us and is happy for us to be finally engaged. I'm sure your brother will be a devoted uncle (perhaps Godfather) to your little one. Ultimately, it's you and your partners special day and you can choose who you want. Put aside your feelings and support your friend in this major life event. Original Posted Thursday, March 28th, 2024. I go to pick up my stuff from their house this week. Her father called me to tell me that I really hurt my friend, and her entire family was expecting me to ask her to be a bridesmaid. Keep it short, sweet, nonspecific, and to the point. Yes, it’s the bride’s wedding day, but it’s a pretty poor way to start a marriage by disrespecting someone else’s. P. My childhood best friend and I (both 25f) have been inseparable since primary school. Let’s call her Leah for the purposes of this post. At the end of the day, I think you did everything you could so that YOUR bachelorette wouldn't be ruined by HER anxiety, and even tried to manage her best as you could. Ruby and Anne had been best friends for 25 years (they didn't grow apart or anything, they stayed in constant contact even as adults) and then Anne suddenly wasn't talking to Ruby anymore. short but polite note telling her that given your recent dispute, you cannit in good conscience be her maid of honor. We’ve been friends since Kindergarten and talked about this our whole lives. I (28F) come from a big extended family. I (28F) am entangled in a wedding drama of epic proportions. Including me and my sister (23F), there are 24 female cousins and 17 male cousins. My sister ( female 23) and I (female 32) have never really gotten along at all. Not the bride. He asked me to be a groomsperson, I told him I didn't feel comfortable taking a spot from his brothers (he has six brothers, all adopted, all of which he's pretty close to and I felt like he should ask them first) and he agreed. My mom was tortured by my dad and said she'd never marry again. It’s your wedding - you do you. jisoojelly. They completely ditched the “groomsman / bridesmaid” and just said “bride’s party / groom’s party. It is important to note that nothing sexual has . I 26 Male and my girlfriend 26 Female have been dating for a little bit over 5 months. This bride is probably six different ways of delusional. I already know this and I won't pay for a dress that makes me look awful. She understandably has been grieving ever since. She has been horrible to me our entire lives, so this process has been no different, infact it's been worse. My OB wouldn’t clear me to fly so I had to miss the pre-wedding events and really shouldn’t have driven the 1400 mile round trip to attend but I didn’t want to regret missing her wedding. she asked me who and I said the names of the people and when I finished she sat there with a smile and said 'and the maid of honor isssss' I looked at her AITA for wanting to refuse being a maid of honor Short story long: been friends with this person for about 8, met this person during my senior year of high school. We haven’t seen them since Nov. recently she asked if I know who is going to be in the wedding party yet and I answered yes. My mum and I weren't trying to be controlling, we were worried! We assumed that something really bad had happened for them to cut contact overnight. 1. So, my husband and I adopted a rescue dog about a year ago. I honestly was hoping that I didn't have to spend this much but just to be safe Your feelings matter too, especially when it comes to being her Maid of Honor. 2- not budging on my opinion. Reply reply. AITA for not wanting my friend to be my maid of honour? I have a childhood friend that I have known since middle school. She was an outgoing bubbly cheerleader and I was a shy nerdy bookworm, so she ditched me for the popular kids. A little backstory , my soon to be husband has a sister who is my best friend. I think it could either go one of two ways (if you tell her). Award. I may be judged for this because to some it may seem insensitive as losing a parent is one of the worst pains, and that I “could have just let her wear the dress. Jane is marrying her fiancé Tom in July and she asked me to be her maid of honour. My best friend is married to her boyfriend if 4 years and they going to have their ceremony, on a few months. I was touched that she asked but told her that while I was thankful for the offer I couldn’t accept. 4 days ago · We got to talking about who we would want in our wedding because she wanted to do a special “proposal” to her side of the wedding court, and she said she wanted to have her best friend since childhood be her “maid” of honor. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I pulled out of being my best friend's maid of honor because my ex was a groomsman for her fiance and he was using this as a way of trying to win me back and was just very pushy. •. So AITA if I decline the maid of honor role entirely? I’d rather just be a regular guest at the wedding. People can choose whoever they want for bridesmaid at a wedding or even have none. The answer here is to send your friend. My step dad respected that and never asked her. WIBTAH if I refused to speak to them and only gave them a note Mar 26, 2024 · "AITA for refusing to attend my best friend’s destination wedding after being demoted from maid of honor?" So, my (28F) best friend “Jenny” (29F) is getting married in a beautiful, albeit very expensive, location overseas. You might be tempted to get specific or let her have it, but don't. 2. Original Post: November 11, 2023. She was the maid of honor in my wedding a couple years ago and I was supposed to be in her wedding as well, but not as maid of honor. The groom had two bridesmaids and a groomsman because he was a fraternal twin (had a sister) and his bffs happened to be another cis-het couple; the bride had two brothers and her bff who was a woman. My ex best friend and me cut things off for the 3rd time today due to communication issues. Best of luck! Right after my boyfriend proposed to me, I asked my best friend (I’ve known her for more than 10 years) to be my Maid of Honor and she gladly accepted. Never married. My best friend of 17 years ghosted me after her wedding. we only had 60 guests Great, I love them and he doesn’t get to hang out with them much. No one she knew were ever together as long as her and my It was ruffles and unflattering to my body shape and she did that so she could look better. TLDR: my best friend Amy calls so many people her best friend and wants to make me her maid of honor and another “best friend” who is a huge opportunist, her matron of honor. Round 4 - service a car/something car related. Help keep the sub engaging! My best friend got married last summer and you bet your ass when she asked me to be her maid of honour I stood up there with by her side. I even told her to maybe postpone the wedding to think about it a little longer because the wedding is now in 5 days and this all happened 2 days ago. Tell us about any non-violent conflict you have experienced; give us both sides of the story, and find out if you're right, or you're the asshole. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! The people in this story are my best friend “Jane”, her brother “Elliot”, and his girlfriend of two years, “Kathy”. Half of the cousins are already married. We would see each other almost every day until graduation. They then went and made up lies to tell all my friends AND my fiance. Update Posted Tuesday, April 2nd, 2024. He only asked her to be his fiancé. Married people are invited as a social unit, unless there is a damn good reason. I had not officially asked her yet to be my maid of honor but it was assumed. I have a female, best friend, let’s call her Nicole that is 26 as well. This is not a good enough reason. The thing is, her childhood best friend is a guy (24M). AITA for refusing to be a bridesmaid in my sister's wedding? Not the A-hole. Feb 9, 2022 · My mom and step dad were engaged for 40 yrs. She didn't actively A friend of mine is getting married and asked me to be the maid of honor. You should be valued as you by the people you call friends, and if this friendship isn't making you feel this way, than it isn't a friendship worth keeping. Britney and I live about 300 miles apart. We were very close growing up until high school. I had always had feelings for my best friend, who we AlarmingCarpenter134. Then he tells me the date is over the May weekend of my friend’s wedding. A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to finally find out if you were wrong in an argument that's been bothering you. In our culture it is custom that best man and maid of honor gift the newlyweds the biggest/most expensive gift, and the rest of the guest use it as a guide what not to exceed. The same goes for bridesmaid. 746 Likes, 27 Comments. 43. We've always been inseparable, and I considered her my closest friend. If it becomes an issue with the bride that’s a different story. Aug 1, 2022 · A maid-of-honor has been cheered for refusing to be in her sister's wedding, after the groom pulled a sordid prank on her. Your brother's so lucky to have you as an older sister looking out for him. In my particular friend group, there is so much pressure on the maid of honor. She’s been bugging me about who my maid of honor is gonna be. Things are uncomfortable but she is and will always be my best friend and I've decided I'm going to be in her wedding. Her and I have been close since the 6th grade. Yesterday I got tired of my boyfriends sister bugging me and I told her my sister will be the maid of honor. Besides, she wants this too badly. I (23F) was invited to my best-friend's wedding this February as her maid of honor. TL;DR I was forced by my mother to ask my cousin to be my maid of honor for my upcoming wedding. Title: AITA for Standing Up to My Controlling MIL Over Our Pet? Hey everyone, I've got a family drama involving my controlling MIL and our beloved pet. This is a place to post your stories and offer feedback on stories that other people post. Our friend group of 6 girls have been very close except for me when I switched high schools my senior year. As her best friend, I naturally assumed I would be chosen as the MOH for her wedding. She wants me to be a bridesmaid, which I am 100% ok with and would love to be one for her. AITA for refusing to go to my best friend's wedding because of her bad attitude towards my girlfriend? I am a 27-year-old woman and my fiance, Emily, has been dating and recently engaged for the last 2 months. TikTok video from ThreadTalk Podcast (@threadtalkpodcast): “AITA for refusing to be my best friends Maid of Honor? #reddit #aita #tifu #redditstory #redditstories #threadtalk #threadtalkpodcast#podcast #redditreadings #wedding”. AITA for refusing to allow my twin to be a bridesmaid at my wedding. This is your day, not hers. When the bride and groom were soon to be engaged it was a very exciting time for them and all our friends. We’ve been friends since high school, and when she got engaged last year, she immediately asked me to be her maid of honor. I was supposed to be the maid of honor but she removed me from the wedding over a dispute regarding my makeup, hair, and "disinterest in the wedding". My recently engaged best friend (29F) asked me to be her Maid of Honor, and words can't even describe how happy I was. Even once we entered adulthood we kept being very close despite I don't care how many people want me to drop my sister, I am overwhelmed as it is by all of this. This is not just any friend, she was Maid of Honor at our wedding. For context: We have been friends for years. I know abusive relationships are hard to get out of and I offered to help her get help, but AITA for not wanting to be the maid of honor or even attend my best friends wedding? NTA. I immediately said my bestfriend (27f) (we’ll call her Britney) would be my maid of honor. That’s exactly what went down in this story from Round 1 - put together the hardest piece of flatpack furniture you can find, preferably one that needs to be drilled into the wall. All through out high school my best friend, we’ll call her Morgan dated her now fiancé Jack. 3K subscribers in the dustythunder community. When I agreed to be one of her bridesmaids, I had Not the A-hole. This girl is notorious for cheating on all her partners and there was a rumour she slept with a teacher. I was torn between supporting my friend and refusing on grounds I just don't think he is right for her, in the end I said yes to being her maid of honor. I (19 female) am supposed to be the maid of honor at my best friend's (19 female) wedding. Prior to meeting my fiance we had quite a party lifestyle and Katie always joked around about this being the last hoorah. Some background. BIL and his kids were nowhere near ready for him to remarry. If you do not attend the wedding, the "it is the bride's day" saying does not fly. Round 2 - fix the leaky sink/install a dishwasher. I would love to participate even if I’m a bridesmaid or not, I’d be happy, but I just don’t want the responsibility of being a maid of honor. I changed high schools because one of the other girls, Anna, began to nonstop bully and belittle me to make herself look better. Leah had an older brother who passed away when they were 7 and 8. It may be way past time to reassess your relationship with your friend. For context we all went to the same school and were in majority of classes together. She's truly uncomfortable with the attention, responsibility or pressure (or a combination). About half a year later it was time to plan my bachelorette party and at first she was very motivated and told me she will take care of everything and that it will be a AITA - I fired my maid of honour. May 7, 2024 · Ask her in person or on the phone (trust us, hashing this kind of thing out over text message or even email will be way less effective) to be straight with you about her reasons behind the refusal. Honestly, I get the feeling that if you give in to your sister on this, this will only be the first of her demands. He’s known her for the 7 years since we’ve been The people in this story are my best friend “Jane”, her brother “Elliot”, and his girlfriend of two years, “Kathy”. We are semi-eloping and have only invited immediate family members, but she has been like a sister for 25 years. Stories do… NTA friendships come and go and it is a good chance to practice self love and set boundaries. Apr 22, 2024 · About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features NFL Sunday Ticket Press Copyright r/AmItheAsshole. You’re being childish, and definitely being an AH. A real friend would support your vision for your wedding. AITA for telling my childhood best friend I no longer want her as my MOH. Even though she won't see it that way, you're NTA. Here are a few potential scenarios and how to deal. The OOP is u/bridesmaidultimatum. Unfortunately she is in another wedding that day and has asked me to move my date so she can attend. Hopefully, she'll understand where you're coming from. Being a sister doesn't instantly make them entitled to be a bridesmaid. One of said lies was that I'm cheating on my fiance,which I'm not. She got married 700 miles away from where we both lived and I was 38 weeks pregnant at her wedding. Not the A-hole. That belongs to someone who genuinely wants the position and put their all into the responsibilities MoH asks for. The action I took was not letting my bridesmaid wear her mothers favourite colour of dress due to it not fitting my wedding theme. My best friend asked me to be her maid of honor and I said yes. However you are an AH for your weird toxic views on life in general and your sister and her achievements/ happiness. Some people are of the mindset that BM/MoH should be family- it's their wedding, they get to make that decision- it's also very much a *choice* to take that decision personally. My (ex) best friend got married this Saturday. I had her as my maid of honor 8 years ago and she promised me that I Youre NTA for declining the maid of honor if you dont think youre the right fit. I let her know I was still willing to be a bridesmaid or just a guest if she preferred that but that I couldn’t take on the responsibility of being maid of honor at The people in this story are my best friend “Jane”, her brother “Elliot”, and his girlfriend of two years, “Kathy”. BG: Younger sister (28f) married two years ago. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. at least that's what i thought. I (26F) have been best friends with Jane (27F) since 5th grade. You were honest with her. NTA. No one is entitled to be anyone’s bridesmaid or groomsman in a wedding. AITA for refusing to be my best friends Maid of Honor? #reddit #aita #tifu #redditstory #redditstories #threadtalk #threadtalkpodcast#podcast #redditreadings #wedding. I feel bad bc she has no friends and only brothers but I told her it wasn’t my fault and wont feel comfortable doing that for her. We’ve been friends since high school, and when she got engaged last year, she immediately asked me to be her maid The bride asked you to be MOH not so you’d do MOH duties, but because you’re still dear to her and she wants you there as her best friend. She uninvited me from the wedding after I Like in another AITA this week, I think this phrase applies: "She may be your best friend, but your not hers. Edit: guys holy shit! This has blown up again. She did the same with her two best friends who were in all the photos with her. When the first one ever asked me to be a bridesmaid I declined. The people in this story are my best friend “Jane”, her brother “Elliot”, and his girlfriend of two years She of course can decline, but if it isn’t for a good reason then she’s being an asshole. They’d been together only a few weeks and broke up the day after. I (18F) was invited to my best friend (19M) wedding to this girl (18F). 2- I don’t want to cause conflict in the family or between me and my sister as our relationship is somewhat rocky. I was thrilled and started helping with the planning, from dress shopping to tasting cakes. Your friend was bang out of line, if they can’t respect your boundaries and respect the time you need then they aren’t a friend. NTA, I’m so sorry you are going through this and I’m sorry for your loss. AITA for refusing to go to my best friend's wedding. I want for her wedding day to be great for her and go off with as little problems as possible. I'm afraid that's the best you could have done, and that didn't save your friendship with Ren. I [27NB] have a best friend [33M] who's getting married. The bride knew that her boyfriend at the time was going to pop the question soon as they had been looking at rings together. My best friends girlfriend was at my wedding. It’s just usually those weeks leading up to that special day that can cause the most headaches. I also have a sister and have been planing to let her be the maid of honor (as she is my sister). AITA for refusing to be maid of honour over a bridesmaid, causing her to get “fired”? I am not the OOP. The point is - sister is asking her to be in the wedding, and instead of finding the ways she can participate comfortably, OP is focused on itemizing reasons she can’t participate. Before the wedding planning started I was talking to her nearly everyday and then once she started planning she kind of Completely unacceptable to *expect* a specific role in somebody's wedding. Apr 9, 2024 · "AITA for refusing to be maid of honour over a bridesmaid, causing her to get “fired”?" bridesmaidultimatum. We have been friends for 12 years. Let's call her Monica. ) I (28F) am entangled in a wedding drama of epic proportions. Congratulations on your pregnancy. ADMIN MOD. " I barely could hold back the first 12 weeks before my hubby and I agreed to tell our closest friends including my bestie. Her wedding is in 2 weeks time, I was meant to be a Maid of Honour and had my final dress fitting and everything about a week ago, since Nina is very particular how she wants her wedding to go so the dresses took 2-3 months to be made. aita podcast stories. They lived on the same street when they were kids and So, my (28F) best friend “Jenny” (29F) is getting married in a beautiful, albeit very expensive, location overseas. bamf1701. The maid of honor is usually the person that is closest to the bride in terms of a friendship so it would be very strange to give her that role. Mood Spoiler: happy ending. We live in a warmer climate area, and it supposed to be pretty warm on the day of her wedding so as the date is approaching, she sent out links for the dresses she wants her bridesmaids and maid of honor to wear and mine happened to be a halter topped dress. WOW, this is a wonderful update. After we had a phone call where she verbally abused me, and has continued to gaslight and harass me, I AITA. Grew up together, did many activities together, we were basically like sisters. ”. We wanted him, so we got her too! A couple are a couple. Feb 1, 2024 · My best friend Katie is planning the bachelorette party. threadtalk_podcast · Original audio ADMIN MOD. She is planning to do the same thing for her wedding. wf hb pl yc oe ta db hk tz qv